such a gift as this.

Did you, when you were young, memorise the Lord’s prayer in Sunday school? Like me, I am sure the importance of those words dulled a bit in the constant repetition. “Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be they name… and so on and so forth…” I know it might seem irreverent of me to write it that way, but isn’t that how it sometimes feels? Like they are just words that have been repeated over and over until all meaning has been wrung from them, like a dish rag gone threadbare and stale. I was listening to a series of messages last week from James MacDonald HERE  called “I choose to Forgive” and I was challenged by his presentation of this topic. Something that had always seemed so familiar to me suddenly took on a more serious light. I missed something in all those repetitions of this rote prayer; I missed the part about forgiveness. Here is why it is a big deal- Christ clearly states that in order for us to be continually forgiven, we MUST forgive the people who have hurt us. WE MUST. It is not a suggestion, it is a requirement. The forgiveness that I have so often taken for granted is slightly conditional on me being reflective of that forgiveness with the people in my life. And after hearing that message series, I went back to my bible again, because I wanted to be sure. And it’s true. In fact, the verses following the pattern set out in the Lord’s prayer say

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, you Father will not forgive your sins. (Matt. 6:14-15)

It doesn’t get much clearer than that. And this goes beyond a mere utterance of forgiveness, this is an actual letting go. A releasing of responsibility. I am to cut the strings that tie someone to the hurt they caused me. I am to say “you are forgiven and I am not holding you to making it up to me at a later date, even if you haven’t apologised. Furthermore, I will not punish you at a later date for said hurt that you caused.” It is really a tall order. Especially because it is almost second nature to hold things against people, to keep a tally sheet. It is an instinct. Like we think that in order to protect ourselves, we must hold grudges. As if someone else’s mistake is something that should define their character and their ability to be a friend. But that is all untrue. In fact, it takes a lot of effort and energy to hold grudges, unforgiveness is serious work for which there is no reward. At all. Period.  It becomes a piling on of weight that makes any forward progress difficult and almost impossible. For me, it is a complete and utter failure to live the life I am called to. Not only practically, but eternally as well. If I choose to withhold forgiveness, I am condemning myself to greater judgement, because I have known great forgiveness, incomparable forgiveness, and am still choosing to live as if I am a judge.  While true forgiveness might take time and cultivation, it will give me the ability to run the race better. It means that I have to let things go. I cannot bring up my husband’s past wrongs in an argument after I have forgiven him. I cannot harbor ill will towards someone who said or did something hurtful. I cannot keep rehashing those bad feelings and attaching them to a person. Can I learn from those things? Yes. Can I set up new boundaries to avoid a repetition of those hurts? Of course. Can I continue to feed the hurt and anger? No. Unequivocally no. There is no way that God can reside in my heart when I am filling it up with grudges. It just doesn’t work. God’s presence is possible in my life as I continue to work towards righteous living, and part of righteous living is forgiving, and forgiving is possible because of God. Choosing to ignore this seriously important part of this relationship will put a wedge between me and God. Choosing to not forgive is choosing to remain in sin. And God cannot tolerate or abide with sin. And that kind of attitude is a sign of ignorance. Unforgiveness in a professed Christian is a sign that they have missed the most important part.

But I know, I can tell you from experience, how difficult forgiveness is. It is so hard. So hard to let things go, to really and truly move past the hurt. But it is possible. Because I can call on God to help me refine that process in my life until I am really able to forgive the way He does, wiping the slate clean over and over. There is no real forgiveness without God. Not just His forgiveness of our sins, but our forgiveness of the sins of those around us. The greatest part is, if we all could commit to this kind of attitude and this kind of change in our lives, we stand to change so much about the world around us. If we can let things go with the ease displayed for us in Christ, then we can influence the lives of people around us without having to shove scripture down their throats. And shouldn’t forgiveness always be the trademark of our faith? For we would not be sons and daughters without such a gift as this.